Thursday, October 18, 2007

Fair Game: Jon Swift

The good old days.

Gotta love the genius of Jon Swift. He does his homework, supports his arguments with a slew of articles I'm too lazy to read through, and consistently makes a good reasonable conservative case. Much better than I can say for his brethren, especially that Colbert guy.

Anywho, it appears that even the most compassionate conservatives really do have it out for children. I, for one, do not blame them. In fact, I feel quite liberated. Children? The future? Balderdash! What are children really good for? It is illegal to send them to work (unless you're lucky enough to live in Laos), you have to shelter feed and clothe them, they're always gumming up your vintage Lugar, they can't even reach the jib on your sloop, and for some reason one feels that due to the fact they share your genes that you are obliged, nay, honored to love them, or something. Children need to pull themselves up by their bootstraps, spit out the teat, and join the millions of passionless drones slaving away to pay down the loan on that Lincoln-Log set or the deluxe Leukemia Treatment they got for Christmas. "I'm just a kid." is a bad excuse for shiftlessness and gluttony. Change your diaper on your own time, mister. You've got microchips to solder.

1 comment:

The Swan said...

Yup. Totally amazing how short-sighted the wingers are. Pennywise and pound foolish right down the line. Healthcare? Education? Too expensive! Let's just give tax cuts to the corporations who make this country great. It's the GDP, stupid!

But Heathcare and Education are longterm investments in America's continued prosperity. If America is to compete in a global economy in the 21st Century, we're going to need smart and healthy KIDS from all walks of life.

I don't know why these conservative HATE America so much. Because that's what all this boils down to. Healthcare for kids? It's a NATIONAL SECURITY issue. Education? It's a NATIONAL SECURITY issue. Seriously, people, I'm not exaggerating.